7/29/22     Marriage, Unity, Being Echad. 

Yahuah has put this desire in me to want to be at harmony with my spouse. 

  1. harmony, harmoniousnessnoun

    compatibility in opinion and action

I have a desire to know the things that he knows and learn the things that he learns. This would be the definition from above. Being harmonious with my spouse means being Echad with him. Letting him learn and grow and be his own person and the same for me. We don't need to trample on each other or suffocate each other and not be allowed to grow. Being Echad means doing life together by realizing that we are on a journey. We are not yet perfected. We have to allow each other to make mistakes and give each other patience while we grow from those mistakes. Always being in a place of love with each other is Yahuah's design. When we are operating in love, the other person's mistakes and faults don't offend us. To be Echad we have to realize that my spouse matters, I matter and our marriage matters. They all 3 have to be attended to, to produce growth.

One thing I know is we have to feel safe and secure with the other person, there can be no fear in the relationship. We can never operate out of fear. The Father has made me realize that I never grew up. I'm still the same little girl that I was when I was 7 or 8. I think that I look to Drew sometimes as a father figure. Yahuah has also made me realize that I have misplaced responsibilities. I have been trying to make Drew my "Source" when Yahuah is the only one who should be my "Source" for happiness, shalom, contentment and anything else. After He made me realize that I still have a little girl inside of me, I prayed and asked Him how to grow up, to become an adult. 

Life truly is a journey and Yahuah teaches us through our living experiences. This refining process that I am going through right now started when Drew and I decided to renew our vows at Sukkot this year. Through watching a video on YouTube, I realized that our marriage is a "congregation." I asked myself if it was a congregation, is it one people would want to go into? I said no. That's when I realized I had a problem and I looked inward to try to start fixing it. I now realize just how important self development and self growth are. I believe self growth and self development are only successful when we start from a place of wanting that because we want to walk more like Yahshua walked and not for any other reason. Any other reason would come out of selfishness and that's the exact opposite of love. Yahuah is love, so we are supposed to be. Growing as individuals helps us to love each other more. 

Fruits of the Spirit:  
This is one thing I believe is important and something we need to pray for daily. It's interesting there are 9 Fruits of the Spirit. Before writing this, I listened to a YouTube video called "9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage." This is how He speaks and this is when I realized that He is very personal and intimate. He loves us and He cares. Drew has always told me that we don't need counsellors because he doesn't believe another man should help us but we should go to Yahuah. I now understand what he is talking about. Yahuah is my teacher in all things in life. He teaches me through His Word, living experiences, people, etc. He's taught me that I cannot control what others think of me or what they say about me but I can control what I think and say about myself. Loving others definitely starts with knowing how to love ourselves first and we need to be thinking of ourselves as valuable and loved because we are. That's a lesson I have been working on. I have learned to be my own preacher, teacher, motivator, life coach, etc. It's because Yahuah has taught me how. Through His Word we can be taught all those things. I quote His Word, different Scriptures for different situations. From practicing that, it has taught me to be all those things. 

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